Motivational Tips
by Elizabeth Majors
It can be extremely tough to find motivation. For some of us, that means putting off important projects, waiting until the last minute to do things, or just not doing them at all. Failing to do what ought to be done can start a negative cycle of bad self-talk, shame, decreased motivation, and further undone tasks. This is especially true for people with depression, for whom the most basic daily tasks can start to seem impossible.
Fortunately, they don’t have to be. There are a few simple steps you can take to help get a jump start on what you want (or need) to be doing.
1. Start Small
If you have a large task in front of you, break it down into parts. Instead of thinking about the paper you have to write in its totality, focus only on the research before moving on. By doing this, daunting things seem more manageable and the anxiety over them is lessened, making you more apt to do them.
If you have depression, start with the simplest thing that needs to be done that you feel is within your reach. If you’ve been wearing pajamas for two days straight and want to change, pick out clothes you want to wear and put them on. Maybe you only manage to change pajama sets, but that’s okay, PJ’s are comfortable! The important part is that you tried. Next time will be easier.
If you really can’t do something, you might be pushing too hard. If you want to go out to the grocery store but haven’t left the house in days, lower the bar and do something similar, like organizing the pantry (and now that your pantry is organized, you know what to buy at the store, too).
2. Start Specific
Make your goals clear when you start. Instead of thinking “I need to clean the house”, think of what specifically needs to be cleaned, like sweeping the floors. With a straight-forward goal in mind it is easier to accomplish and then appreciate the results.
3. One at a Time
Don’t stretch yourself too thin! Even in the flurry of finals week, when it seems like you really should study for all four of your exams at the same time while finishing that essay and making flash cards, resist the urge. While some of us are excellent multi-taskers, the best way to get things done is individually. Devote your full attention to whatever is at hand, and manage your time so that you can get everything you need done, done, just not all at once.
4. Just do It
Sometimes we have to do things that we really don’t want to do, like go to the DMV or get shots. If you’re depressed, things you once loved can seem like a drag. Understand that not everything we do will be enjoyable. Make goals simply to do them, not like them, and plan time to reward yourself for doing them later.
5. Reward Yourself
Look at you. Making goals and doing things and being awesome. Give yourself a pat on the back. Get ice cream, do what makes you happy. Don’t do anything at all, relax, take a bath. Go see that movie you’ve wanted to see for weeks. You deserve it. It doesn’t take a degree in neuroscience to figure out that a reward at the end makes the task itself so much more doable.
6. Practice Good Self-Talk
Good self-talk is more than just a motivational skill, it’s important for life in general. All too often we talk down to ourselves, and that isn’t healthy. Would you want to do something your someone that was always nagging you about what you did wrong? It’s no wonder we procrastinate when we are constantly reminded of our shortcomings.
Even when you don’t get something right or don’t reach your goal, there’s no reason to beat yourself up about it. Remind yourself that you tried, that you did the best you could. If you thought you fell short or got lazy, make an honest effort to try harder next time, but remember that one act of laziness does not make you a lazy person. If you catch yourself thinking poorly, replace those thoughts with opposites. Change “I’m never going to get this done.” To “I’m going to finish this, but I acknowledge that it might take a while.”
During the task, pump yourself up. For example, as you’re writing a paper, be conscious of the act. Think to yourself, “I’m on a roll! I can totally do this, no problem. Even if I get writer’s block, I know I’ll get around it.”
7. Remember, Remember
If you want to do something long-term, place notes where you’re sure to seem them, like on your mirror and computer. Make it bold, short and sweet, like “Read 30 Pages Today” if you need to finish a book in a set window of time. You can set automatic reminders on your phone calendar or email (I know Gmail does this).
8. Help!
If you feel something is out of your reach, don’t be afraid to ask for help. If you feel pressed for time, see if anyone would be willing to work with you. Join a group with similar goals, like a training team if you want to run a marathon.
When depression is in the mix, confide in someone you feel comfortable talking to. Tell them what you would like to do, and see how they can help you out. Invite them to do tasks with you, like going for walks outside. I know they would love to spend the time with you even if doesn’t sound like much.
Fortunately, they don’t have to be. There are a few simple steps you can take to help get a jump start on what you want (or need) to be doing.
1. Start Small
If you have a large task in front of you, break it down into parts. Instead of thinking about the paper you have to write in its totality, focus only on the research before moving on. By doing this, daunting things seem more manageable and the anxiety over them is lessened, making you more apt to do them.
If you have depression, start with the simplest thing that needs to be done that you feel is within your reach. If you’ve been wearing pajamas for two days straight and want to change, pick out clothes you want to wear and put them on. Maybe you only manage to change pajama sets, but that’s okay, PJ’s are comfortable! The important part is that you tried. Next time will be easier.
If you really can’t do something, you might be pushing too hard. If you want to go out to the grocery store but haven’t left the house in days, lower the bar and do something similar, like organizing the pantry (and now that your pantry is organized, you know what to buy at the store, too).
2. Start Specific
Make your goals clear when you start. Instead of thinking “I need to clean the house”, think of what specifically needs to be cleaned, like sweeping the floors. With a straight-forward goal in mind it is easier to accomplish and then appreciate the results.
3. One at a Time
Don’t stretch yourself too thin! Even in the flurry of finals week, when it seems like you really should study for all four of your exams at the same time while finishing that essay and making flash cards, resist the urge. While some of us are excellent multi-taskers, the best way to get things done is individually. Devote your full attention to whatever is at hand, and manage your time so that you can get everything you need done, done, just not all at once.
4. Just do It
Sometimes we have to do things that we really don’t want to do, like go to the DMV or get shots. If you’re depressed, things you once loved can seem like a drag. Understand that not everything we do will be enjoyable. Make goals simply to do them, not like them, and plan time to reward yourself for doing them later.
5. Reward Yourself
Look at you. Making goals and doing things and being awesome. Give yourself a pat on the back. Get ice cream, do what makes you happy. Don’t do anything at all, relax, take a bath. Go see that movie you’ve wanted to see for weeks. You deserve it. It doesn’t take a degree in neuroscience to figure out that a reward at the end makes the task itself so much more doable.
6. Practice Good Self-Talk
Good self-talk is more than just a motivational skill, it’s important for life in general. All too often we talk down to ourselves, and that isn’t healthy. Would you want to do something your someone that was always nagging you about what you did wrong? It’s no wonder we procrastinate when we are constantly reminded of our shortcomings.
Even when you don’t get something right or don’t reach your goal, there’s no reason to beat yourself up about it. Remind yourself that you tried, that you did the best you could. If you thought you fell short or got lazy, make an honest effort to try harder next time, but remember that one act of laziness does not make you a lazy person. If you catch yourself thinking poorly, replace those thoughts with opposites. Change “I’m never going to get this done.” To “I’m going to finish this, but I acknowledge that it might take a while.”
During the task, pump yourself up. For example, as you’re writing a paper, be conscious of the act. Think to yourself, “I’m on a roll! I can totally do this, no problem. Even if I get writer’s block, I know I’ll get around it.”
7. Remember, Remember
If you want to do something long-term, place notes where you’re sure to seem them, like on your mirror and computer. Make it bold, short and sweet, like “Read 30 Pages Today” if you need to finish a book in a set window of time. You can set automatic reminders on your phone calendar or email (I know Gmail does this).
8. Help!
If you feel something is out of your reach, don’t be afraid to ask for help. If you feel pressed for time, see if anyone would be willing to work with you. Join a group with similar goals, like a training team if you want to run a marathon.
When depression is in the mix, confide in someone you feel comfortable talking to. Tell them what you would like to do, and see how they can help you out. Invite them to do tasks with you, like going for walks outside. I know they would love to spend the time with you even if doesn’t sound like much.